Neal shares his rules on how you can get to know the people that you want to have business with. Also, learn more about how to create balance in your life and why you should invest your time with people and get to know them well.
Listen to the podcast here:
01:31 – A Little Bit About Neal
03:40 – One of the Great Secret to Success
06:43 – Balance And Equilibrium
07:41 – Create Balance in Your Life
14:42 – Discipline, Practice and Consistency
Neal Sperling is the Founder and CEO of a Global Business Strategic Advisory Service that has advised start-ups, mid-cap companies, non-profits, to very high net worth individuals.
Neal Sperling, has created successful business and marketing plans, branding, licensing, promotional and public outreach strategies and solutions for his clients. In select cases he has even created conferences and special events to connect his clients with their most prized prospects Neal has strategized and helped clients solve often extremely complex and difficult business and professional challenges, and then connected them to individuals who have changed their lives for the better, and has even helped them to fulfill their unique life’s purpose; hence, he’s been called a “World Class Problem Solver” and a “World Class Connector.”
For more information on Neal, please visit: http://www.worldclassconnections.com
Michael Silvers [00:01] : Hi everyone. This is Michael Silvers. I wanted to welcome you all to the podcast today. Yeah, the mentor studio. It’s great to have you all back on. Again, we have so many mentors that we bring to you and is everybody knows that I say we have coaches and mentors and we’ll be bringing coaches along the way to who will and what does the coach do. Very simply kicks you behind to get you moving forward to make sure that you do what you say you’re going to do. And then we have mentors and mentors are typically people who are already where you want to be. It could be in lifestyle, could be in your same career, whatever that is, but there’s somebody that you want to always listen to and you want to help them drive you forward in your business.
Michael Silvers [00:37] : And we will bring the best of the mentors in the world. And again, you know, when you joined us at the mentor studio, you’ll have actually access to them. An access is just not watching a video. Access is being able to talk to them and that makes a big difference. So today I want to introduce a gentleman and he’s going to tell you a little bit about himself and then we’re just gonna chat. How’s that sound? And everybody. Let’s give a warm welcome to Mr Neal Sperling. Neal how are you?
Neal Sperling [01:01] : I’m just great and thank you so much Michael. I’m honored to be here.
Michael Silvers [01:05] : Here’s how the world works, everyone. It’s connections and it’s funny because if you hear Neal’s background, you’ll understand what I’m saying, but it really is. It’s who do I know and who can I connect with, but it’s bigger than that. It’s actually how can I be of service and connect others and that will always come back and that’s really that mindset to start having. But Neal, why don’t you tell us just a little bit about your background.
Neal Sperling [01:31] : Sure. Thank you Michael. You know, it’s interesting that we’re on the phone together and reality is, I think I’m probably looking back on my life. The world’s greatest myths missed it. I think if I like to tell people I’ve made every mistake in the book twice and the reason I made it twice to make sure that the first time I was making that mistake I was making it correctly. So I went through a lot of trial and error in my life and I’m sure a lot of people can identify with it. But one thing I learned about myself is I was pretty good at seeing how things fit together. Connections. And in fact, one of the things I tested really high on in school was that. And so it took me a long time to understand how it was to assemble that talent into something marketable.
Neal Sperling [02:08] : But basically what I do is two things. I help people to connect with puzzle pieces in their business, to find the missing donut in the box, to basically make things synergize and work effectively so they can get to the next level. And the other thing is, once I do that, I also see how people can fit really well with other people. I’ve been privileged to get to know in my network now. And as you know, it’s the sky has been the limit once I’ve figured this all out. And so I’ve had relationships with CEOs, billionaires, celebrities, and it’s just been an amazing ride. Once you find your groove and I call often counsel people to do that, be patient but be tenacious and when you find your groove, all things can follow.
Michael Silvers [02:50] : You know, it’s so true. Actually it’s a great point because what happens is, especially for those who started out as an entrepreneur or as an actor, producer or writer or whatever, you know, it’s whatever business they’re in. And remember that’s the big point is a business. There’s a tendency of not sort of looking down the road, right? And they’re looking at what I can get right now. What have you done really to look down the road or to keep that momentum going so you don’t get stuck or shiny baubles getting in your way.
Neal Sperling [03:21] : This is not going to be the expected answer, but I’ll tell you that when things really started flowing for me was when I basically learned to surrender to the universe. I find very often my most people are so focused on their own agenda that they’re missing a lot of opportunities and also being sensitive to other people’s agendas. One of the great secrets to success I have found is to put your agenda aside and focus on the real needs, not even the launch, but the needs of other people. And when you do that and you do it from an authentic place, the world opens up to you. And, and there’s a sense of trust and an interdependency that built quickly. And so consequently, one of the reasons I think I’ve been known to become a connector or super connector here is because I do that.
Neal Sperling [04:05] : I practice what I preach. And when people sense that you’re real and you’re genuine, you honestly want to help them, they drop their defenses and you have a real conversation, that can lead to real results. So I would say basically if you are so focused on what you want to accomplish, you know, maybe reconsider that and start looking at how you can service other people who then if they’re reciprocal and there’s ways to determine that. And I have a whole check sheet for that to basically screen the right people to do business with. But if you can do that, I think, you know, opportunities start to come to you. And so consequently, I don’t really think much about looking down the road anymore because when I get so many inbound calls and referrals from people, every day I wake up and answer the phone, it’s a new adventure for me. It’s the life that I’ve always dreamed of having.
Michael Silvers [04:56] : Isn’t that great? You know, that’s a great point too, because we talked about this, I want to make more money and we all understand when you’re first starting out in business and the bills are greater than the money flow, right? And months seem short but it is really about creating a lifestyle over a time. Is that not true?
Neal Sperling [05:16] : Absolutely. I mean, you know, you can be a slave to the machine and the rat on the wheel or you can really start thinking about, OK, so if my strategy is to be happy, if my strategy is to have fulfillment in life, one of those aspects of certainly money, but it’s an interesting axiom that you know, if you start to surrender your anxieties and your focus and people sense these things and really have more of a service mentality that people will want to help you if you select the right people to be in business with. And so I have people all the time who were coming to me and you know, it seems like the real reason there is that not only do they me and they trust me, when you’re assembling deals, people typically have some of the pieces are most of the pieces, but not all the pieces. And being a connector, because I have this philosophy, they know that I probably have someone in my network or have some missing piece, so I essentially don’t have to look or strive anymore to find a new business. It finds me because of that.
Michael Silvers [06:18]: And again I keep hearing it’s because you’re always a service to others.
Neal Sperling [06:24] : I was raised that way by my mom. She was a very authentic person and always looking for the best in people and trying to find how she can be helpful to them. And there’s actually a danger to one extent with strictly coaches and others who tend to be hard centered and they don’t look out for their interests. So it’s important to have a balance and equilibrium in that. But at the same time, if you have a philosophy where it doesn’t have to be a win lose, but you know win-win, and you’re not about to me, but throughout the we. When people sense that, you know, they come to want to do business with you. They want to trust you. And consequently, you know, you attract people like magnets. It really is about the law of attraction. I think that’s part of the secret.
Michael Silvers [07:09] : That’s a great point though, because sometimes we do talk about being of service, but people be of service themselves into the ground, right? There is that point. You do give. I mean, giving back what it’s about and it will come back. We know that. But, that’s a very fine line between, you know, cause you and I have been the success we’ve had in the people we know is because a lot of it’s been we give back. And there’s also times to cut the deal for a percentage. You know what I’m saying? It’s, and, but it’s a win-win for both.
Neal Sperling [07:41] : Yeah. It’s about creating balance in your life and balanced can lead to happiness. And it’s understanding what balance is. So, you know, if you’re driven and you’re working 20 hours a day and you’re achieving a lot of money, but you have no family and you know, there’s other pieces of your life that are not giving you the happiness. So I think, you know, after all these years I’ve kind of come to a place where I see how to create that balance by having rules. And so I think about things a lot that most people pass over quickly. They’re usually the obvious and I’ll take three days to think about the obvious and I’m packet. For example, I had a great call before I went up to Canada to speak and actually led to that opportunity was about trust and what is trust and how do you have this dependability which trust implies and so I have rules of engagement, rules about desiccation, rules of reciprocity. And very often without people knowing it, I kind of run my radar over them to see how they’re showing up and how many of these rules they are practicing. And I find that I attract people who practice more of these rules even if it’s on a subliminal basis because they’re living a life of success and purpose. And so they’ve become enlightened. And I think it’s really important to spread that kind of mindset. Because the more you do, you know, you move into a position where things start to flow and you don’t have to be working as hard, you can be working a lot smarter.
Michael Silvers [09:04] : Right. That’s great. My hat’s off to that. I’m going to plot on that one. That’s right. This is the question that always comes up and this is the biggest, you know, we’ve all had those failures, challenges, obstacles, and do you mind just talking about maybe one that’s happened in your life and really how you overcame it? I can almost tell from what you’ve said already, but in any specific, maybe just a one, two or one, two, three that everybody can follow on this call over the next week or two.
Neal Sperling [09:35] : I think the most important failures that I’ve had were initially that I. because I have a positive mindset and I think abundantly rather than in terms of scarcity, I’ve maybe been too trusting earlier in my life. But I unpack that and I thought about it and that’s why, again, I have developed these rules that have really guided me and they’re pretty, I would say they work about a hundred percent of the time in a hundred percent of situations. You know, I really look at the four corners of a person, much like people are taught to think about it, four corners of the contract. And so I look at how can you know in terms of these areas if there have consistently good judgment, consistently good character, consistently good habits and consistently a good temperament and most people don’t, but you know, if you watched them. And the operative word is consistency. You take some time and get to know people. The more they show up in all four of those areas, the more I tend to gravitate and want to do business with them and have fewer surprises and fewer disappointments. So now I don’t have many disappointments in my life.
Michael Silvers [10:37] : That’s great. That’s fantastic. So I’m the one last piece. This is great. And actually, if everybody’s really listening to this call, Neal’s probably given you about 10 points you could walk away with right now, which would very much will increase or really that lifestyle that you want to give will make a big difference. But here’s what I sometimes call the bonus round. I don’t do it all the time, Neal. But for you, this is gonna work really well because again, so let’s say right, a few food and shelter was provided and you were today starting again from scratch. You had a laptop, $500 and the experience and knowledge that you have, what would you do in the next seven days?
Neal Sperling [11:19] : Well, I found that success is really about who you know, which is why I am a connector and early in my career or I made it my business to go to conventions and conferences where people who are smarter and more capable than me were speaking. And I made it my business after that conference to go up to them to see how I could help them. And even though I wasn’t really secure with myself and knowing that I have something to offer, they appreciated that. So that lets me building relationships with centers of influence, I will characterize it in different vertical markets and I realize if I can get to all the centers of influence and various marketing channels, that I would never be impoverished person because essentially if I had an authentic relationship, there was trust and I had a meet and they were willing to help me. I can get into any literally any market and market my products or services or those of my clients. And that happened pretty quickly for me after I realized that.
Michael Silvers [12:14] : It’s is so true. So you know, and I’d take a look at it and everybody out there to listen to this. This is really clear. It’s about the connections, the network. It’s about getting out there. And I tell people I’m not promoting anything because the way. But you know, there’s a difference between like chamber events. There’s also differences between like the BNI. There’s networking groups, there’s chamber events, and realize that a business card also doesn’t mean you have a relationship right away. So just to wrap this up at the end, how do you develop the relationships?
Neal Sperling [12:44] : Well, the first thing I do is I do a lot of active listening and you’re absolutely right about these chamber events and so far most people are transactionally based. They want to get to the transaction or about their agenda, but the people that are truly relationship based and service based. I find in the vast minority and so for me, I like to practice my principles and show up and by acting truthfully to how I believe relationships should developed people who are transaction where you start to think about how they’re approaching me. So it’s not trusting a business card in my face, spending two minutes and going on and thinking it’s a numbers game. You know, it’s about investing your time with people and getting to know them and really feeling like you want to do business with them. I’ve often suggested people to not think about what they’re selling, but who they’re selling, you’re selling yourself first. If people like you first, then they’ll consider whatever it is your product or your service that you’re offering. They have to like you first.
Michael Silvers [13:38] : That’s great. They have to like you first. That’s what we’re going to end. It was so true. And again, realize that this world, we’re in a very much a three clicks and you’re off world in a way. So it is that opinion that they’ll capture so quickly about you and just be authentic. Be out there yourself. And really they’ll know immediately. So Neal, this has been great. There’s a ton of stuff in here. If I was listening to this, I would listen to this five, six, seven, eight times in again because they’ll just put those bullet points right in there. You’re welcome, Neal. This is actually a great podcast. Everybody on there is listening and again, I would listen to it once, go apply it, listen to it again in a week, go apply it. And take the notes that Neal put out there because Neal’s been incredibly successful at what he’s done and again, Neal’s actually going to be part of our team and we’ll be on q and a calls in the future for all of you and he’s got a great way of just nailing down where you are, where you need to be in moving forward.
Neal Sperling [14:42] : Thank you so much and I appreciate that. And it really is. I just want to say it really is about discipline, practice and consistency. That is the operative word. You know, if you’re inconsistent, people can’t trust you. So really first having the understanding of these principles that will make you more effective in the world. And then secondly, living them consistently makes you a person that people want to gravitate towards.
Michael Silvers [15:02] : Awesome. Thank you so much Neal. And by the way, for all of you who are part of the metro studio, all of Neal’s information will be on the faculty page. So if you want more information or want to connect with him, please do. I think you’ll see brilliance. And I don’t always say that Neal. But I heard it today. I think you’ll see some brilliance and as somebody who’s got a truly just a heart that’s, you know, you come from that position that makes it, makes the world. I almost don’t even know what to say. It just makes the world a better place. So
Neal Sperling [15:30] : Thank you so much for those compliments and thank you. I really appreciate it.
Michael Silvers [15:34] : You’re welcome. And I want to thank everybody for being on the call today. We really appreciate your time with us. Wherever you are in the world, morning, afternoon, or evening, if you’re listening to this while you’re driving, take the notes when you go home. If you’re listening to this at home, take the notes now. It’s been just an amazing pleasure Neal to have you on the phone. I know we’ll be working together a lot in the future. And again, you know, for those of you listening to the mentor studio, thank you so much for being part of everything that we do and we’ll keep bringing you the best of the best in the world. And a time to really just spend with us. All right, Neal. Thank you very much and have a wonderful day.
Neal Sperling [16:08] : My great pleasure. Thank you again.
Michael Silvers [16:10] : Thank you